hot take: moms need to learn how to listen to and comfort their daughters without making everything about their own traumas
a classic example
daughter: hey this thing you do bothers me very much and i wish you wouldn’t do it
mom: well my parents abused me and im not even as bad as they were and i had to sit through it so you gotta sit through whatever i do to you too
a common variant
mom: well i’m having a really hard time right now and you know that i’m doing my best and that i didn’t mean to hurt you ergo you are in fact the asshole for asking me to consider your feelings and change my behavior during this hard hard time i’m having
least favorite
mom: fine. you’re right and i’m wrong and i’m a horrible person. there. are you happy now?
see also
mom: you can’t be mad at me. you’re not allowed to be mad at me. i can’t stand it.
Last two are definitely my mom and hence why he don’t talk.
